28 july 2010

i realised that i got a bit bored with my daily life. i use to be playing with basketball everyday. guess what? maybe it had been a legend after all. nowadays, i use to read books.... i sacrifice my time just to read those stpm books.. i sacrifice my eyes... my eyes started to get blur. i cant see thing clearly from far away. maybe it is because i use too much of my sighteness when i read books.

2 weeks more it will be excel exam and almost 100 days more will be stpm. i am still leak of the strength to motivate me study. because i achieve number 1 in my school, i dont have the push to study hard as before. i become very lazy and clumsy through out the time.

i also started to go church which is quite boring to me. listening to those unenlightenment talk by the priest. .. please le.. i think i dont need those thing... what i need is something that can motivate me... to me, those talk is for those who walk the devil path.

now, i still got plenty of sejarah books to study and also geography plus pengajian am & a bit econ.

i still dont have the courage to face the real exam. perhaps i should be friend wit my fear, let fear overcome me and let it be one of me.

fear is my ally. fear confirms me. fear is energy that is convertible to power- our power

Deal with The boss; Donald Trump

today i walked around the town and within 1 hour, i manage to sell 15 coupons of my school bazaar. so, i am really proud of myself.

god bless me that i managed to sell 6 coupons during my last 10 minutes, then my mom called me up.so, i learn the gut to deal with people, without shame, just deal with the boss.

even one of the boss of the shop just told me that he just support rm100 for one of the student of st mary, but he still by one coupons from me.

nevertheless, i still hope that

Win big or lose big

on the 7th of august, my school, st mary is going to held a bazaar. so, on that day my class is going to sell cakes, sushi, handicraft, drinks; coke, mango juice/ kiwi juice and also we are going to set a 6 game stores.

the main problem is i find that my classmate dont have any reaction at all to the bazaar. am we leak of communication, or did give wrong command? i and 3 other girl go out to find sponsor for our class, the girls manage to find rm400 for our class. i really appreciate their sincerity in helping to find our class fund. thank you very much lee yian yee, quek ying ying and leong kat fun.

i know that there are some conflict at gavel club there where leong kat fun ask sponsor of rm100 from gavel club. you know what? i praise her for her bravery. i heard friends said that she is sucks because she use the gavel club to seek sponsor for 6AK1 class, but i can say one thing to those who think badly about her is" did you guys go seek for sponsor? you all blame her on taking sponsor from gavel club for our class?" you know what, fuck you guys, (o0o). if you guys brave enought like her, you guys can easily get the sponsorship from gavel club.

nevertheless, thanks so much for those who put their heart in helping to make success in the bazaar. i appreciate my interact president , clement lim for putting so much effort in helping me too. i can see that he is very busy on his interact installation night but in the mean time, he was able to help me in creating a fishing pole( game store). he was also busy in his BSMM marching, exam, but he did not say " i cannot do that" . so, i was touched by his action. you know what? i see he got enthusiams in doing work.

studying in form 6 is not about study, we have to learn how to social with people, how to lead people. you guys can imagine that if one day we work in a big company, as a labour for that company, we need to work for that company truthfully, no simply waiting for the end of the month and get salary.

back to the main topic, i dont see any communication between me and my classmate, so , i hope that i can have all my fellow teammates to support me. please friends... what i want is you guys work with me, no you guys work under me. i believe with the respect and truly support from you guys, we can be able to win big as a TEAM.

T=TOGETHER ,E=EVERYONE, A=ACHIEVES, M=MORE

I learn it from RYLA, thank you very much for raising me up.
I also miss the ryla participant very much, what can i say, i am not born as intelligent man but i build my intelligent step by step, i fight with my spirit, i told my self that i can do it. i believe in myself that i can make something extraordinary to happen.

little hardworking girl

these few days, i had orientation programmes with my junior( lower six) student. those student were very funny and playful. among them all, i had a little interested in one of them. that student was very hardworking and also a bit noobie. ( lol, looks like i am saying bad thing about him). nay~ no,no, i really like her style very much( not those love like<--) . what i mean is, i like her hardworkng style. she is very active that she cant stop do any activities.

actually, i see potential in her, with her perseverance, she will be able to score 4A in her stpm. this is the kind of quality that i have been searching for. those who cant stop do thing. i admit that i really lose to this kind of people. so, if allah can allow me to teach her, i hope she can be able that score well in her up coming exam.

i also hope that she will be able to realise that form 6 is not easy to study. be hardworking in study but not school activities. what the teacher ask them to do, just annoy them. books is your first priority, not school activities. and also dont date anyone because they will be a burden or blockage to your study. so, i really hope that she can do well in her study

alhamdulilah, may allah bless her

Pressure on the stupid school painting wall project

what the fuck, i really mad at it. the whole fucking wall of the ground floor- total of 8 large wall + 8 small wall needed to be paint. at last, only a few bunch of people leave to do the painting. the others? family sick , got planning for friday , got other important thing to do. what the fuck with these people, how about us ?? those stupid fellow that paint the fuckng wall in the school? doesn't we also have important thing to do? doesn't we have thing to plan ? we dont need to study ?

damn it, it's my false. i accept this stupid task and let my members suffer with me. come on,man . this is not going exactly to what i plan to be. those fuckers that dont help in this project. i pray for u guys can have a good future. maybe oneday,you guys will also suffer like what we( bunch of drawers) suffer today. paint like an idiot, but at last, we cant finish it.

if you guys--> (those who dont help) want help from us in the future. i am the first one to say NO to u guys, i have enough of it. leader, you take care of the BSMM urself. i want to concentrate on my study in the future. damn you, also give me job to do and you yourself dissappear in the midle of nowhere. o0o. fuck you !

I TRUST HER

I told myslef that i trust her, because of "trust" that word is very important between us. if both of us cannot even trust each other, then for what reason we ..........

Hope that i can still concentrate in my study ... 3.5 cpG gogogo!!!!!

SHE HAD GONE !

i sms her at 9.p.m. she was with other guy at somewhere else. i thought i can find her and lend her my shoulder but i am late and i miss the chance... bet that i and her have no destiny at all...

eventhought we had not start , but i hope she will continue her life bravely... good luck to you

may god bless you in the future.

we lost again~

today our school face sm.sungsiew and we lost the game by 6 point. nevermine, to me, it's nothing, maybe it's time for me to retire from the arena of basketball. but, i tell myself that i will train a new bunch of st.mary student in playing basketball. i hope that the coming may which there is a under 18 basketball cup, i hope that our school team can managed to win that cup

we lose!!!!! st mary lose versus sm tiong hua

what is happening to me today. i keep on scolding my teammate until myself also became confused with the game. maybe my way of treating them is a harm to them or they are not that experience to play. haiz... nevermine, thing had passed , i learnt valuable lesson from it. maybe they are still small, i should use children style to teach them.

tomorrow morning still need to play for the third place, at least we can win number 3 for st.mary. no mood at all, but... i have to let it go... such as life, human will die one day, so, i lose today that doesn't mean that i will lose tomorrow. i should stand up back and with this time experience, maybe i will improve a lot from it. thanks god for giving me this valuable experience.

HALELUYAH, A MI TO BO, INSYA ALLAH

Tired + nervous day

today's date is 9/10/2010( tuesday) , it's our last basketball practice day. tomorrow we will face sm tiong hua. what a nervous day for me. my mind keep on thinking about the game. i feel very scare to lose the match. we train so hard and i hope we can have success in return.

due to exam that crash with the basketball match schedule, i still need to study for tomorrow subject which is pengajian am and geography. nevermine ! i forfeit this test. for me , winning the basketball match is my main point. so, nothing gonna stop me from doing it. this test which consist of 10 % of our full examination mark, so , at least i can still score 5 out 10 gua<<<~.~

anyway, good luck to myself, take care and make it to the finale!!!!!! you can do it !!!!!!!

St.mary boleh!

today is 4 of february, it's the day that our school(st.mary) versus sm sung siew. we made it ! haha, we won sm sung siew by 48 per 32. i felt so happy to see those faces of sung siew loser. i felt no guilty for winning them. they deserved it. we practice so hard so that we can in finale. today, i also saw our principle felt very nervous too. she enjoyed our game very much. this can be happiest thing ever happens this year upon me. but, i still got to win number 1!!! not number 2!!! tiong hua, awas la!!!!!!!

2 february 2010, stupid day

today after school end, i stay at science class( 6as), chit chat with two friends, hiung and jiun. damnit! what am i doing? didn't i supposed to stayed after school for study purpose? i don't wanna talked with them BUT their topic really attracted me to talk with them

one of them, jiun, said that he still love her ex-girlfriend, another, hiung refuse to said about his love affair. haha, not bad. i did benefit some secret from them. so, hiung and jiun , dont mess with me! or else, i will blow out every secret of you guys, hehe>.<

haiz, talked back about my exam, due to my basketball competition held on the 11 february 2010, i need to sit for the economy exam paper earlier at the 8th of feb. so, now i am worrying about the exam. shit! i dont wanna write anything else. i now go study eco!!!!!!!!!!

what am i going to be when i graduated? what is my ambition? my aim?

everyone have their own ambition, what they want to be when they graduated? for me? i still confused in it. my mind is still blured with it when people asked me. i like work that seems alive. not like banking , office work, those keep repeat everyday. these kind of work seems dead to me. how i i choose to become a teacher? i think i will die before my age reach 30. why? because i will vomit blood everyday in the school because of those naughty , noob student. then why dont i become a lawyer like my big brother? i find that lawyer need to memorise many thing such as law rule, malaysia rule. these kind of thing can i use it when i am out of the country?no for sure, it's sound sucks to me! so, what i really like then?

actually what i like is sxxxxxx. why i like sxxxxxx? sxxxxxx is very free. i can enjoyed it as it is a part of my life. i felt that when i am doing it , i feel no stress at all. feel free like a bird, fly all around the world without any stress at all.

i know that one day i can accomplish my dream. so, i wont forget my aim. i will achieve it even when i reached 80 years old( maybe 70). wish god bless me.. so far so well, stpm gogogogo, jia you and : strenght!

it's 30 january 2010, 5 days to inter school basketball competition

last night, i had a horrible day, i was forcing myself to stay awake until 12.30a.m.why? my friends played " lami" ( a kind of tile game using the concept of card) until crazy. but, nevermine it's okie, i can managed to wait until my friend, chong lost his last game and we immediately back home.to tell the truth, last night bbq food was very suck, i was going to the bbq with empty stomach but i only ate some of the chicken wing only, the other foods such as yam+corn ball( dunno what it's), oyster ( i thinked i ate the oyster shit) , omg!!!! hope today i won't get stomache.

but nevermine, i agreed with my two friends opinion, Yap & lung, that we wont have bbq anymore instead we try other occasion. that's it i thinked i need to play facebook first. tata~

why people don't know how to appreciated?

what the fuck! today at school, 4.p.m. i as the head coach for my school (st.mary) basketball team, get scolded back by one of the player of the team. fuck that boy. i teached him how to defence and he scolded me in returned. damnit. boy! i teached you with my heart man. do you know that i am having my exam soon ? what the fuck i wasted all my time in teaching noobs like you and get scolded back? damn it, think properly, man. In the whole sandakan, can you find someone like me that can waste his time teaching you guys played basketball everyday? fucking asshole. i really so regreted to play this head coach role.

okie, i am finished scolding now. hai~~~~ all stress gone. actually, when i saw these noobs scolded me , i remembered myself when i am the same age as them. when i am the age of them , i also scold back my coach. finally, i can understand what my coach felt that time. but, this kind of matter won't stop me from my aim, NUMBER 1 IN SANDAKAN SCHOOL STATE COMPETITION!!!!!!!! GOGOGO

24 of january 2010

what a tired weekend, i started getting weary. i need more strenght to go on a new level. i cannot be the old me. it's time to start a new chapter.eventhough it's not easy to achieve but i told myself that i won't give up that easily!

tommorrow morning after school i will stay with a friend at school and continue study. i need to be more concentrate in my studying.. god .. pls give me the strenght... i dont want do it half way...

5.30pm's Thief

I just came back from my school. i usually reach home at 5.30pm but today it's different. it's now 6.30pm. i had a basketball practised at school with some of my friends. three of them were really unlucky today because they lost their handphone, i.c and wallet. the stories started like this.

when we finished our basketball training at 5.25pm, we were about to back home. suddenly, one of my friends from form 4k, said'oh, guai," i think i lost my bag. he and his other two friends put their belongings into a small levis bag. so, now the bag is gone~. we go class by class to find out the lost bag. first, we went to the class form "2 merah", when we reach there, i asked all the students to put their bags on the table. then we started searching each bags.

one weird thing happens there, the student there seems like primary 2 students. one of them said to us " bang, bang , cari apa ni". i replied him" bang cari beg levis yang kawan bang hilang ni, kamu ada nampakkah?"he answered me back"bang,bang, saya rasa saya tahulah , mesti budak di sebelah kelas yang curi, mereka sembahyang tadi". my mind came out a question" their face look so honest, how can they be the stealer".then we go searched the other classes. we can't find anything.

Next, we go to the gate and one of the teacher told us that their ustaz( malay teacher) found a beg in the surau (mini mosque for malay student worship). then we immediately find the ustaz. the ustaz said that he saw a bag with i.c, money and beg.they we quickly rush to the surau and find that the beg has gone and what left is only 2 wallet with all money stolen away.one of the three casualty cried,tears started to dropped from his eyeball. i asked myself that time, "what can i do now", if i called for the teacher to looked after us , this kind of matter won't happen. the boy cried sadly and said " this handphone is a present from my mom because of my good exam result, it's costs rm600. how am i going to expain it to my mom. everyday, i back home with the handphone in my hand" (haiz).

When i saw him, i felt very sorry for him. if i am the one who lost the handphone, maybe i will think that maybe i'm unlucky today or i can buy back another one but for him, that handphone was very important for him. he worked hard for it and now he lost it. so, i learn a lesson, a lesson that i will never forget in my heart. this kind of people appreciate thing that they earn it from they hardworking. In comparison, me? do i care if my handphone lost like him?(i can buy a new one , haha) i felt that this kind of feeling from his tears, from the way he say out, it touched my heart. Thank you, LIONELD, i learn very much from today's experience. this king of feeling is hard to tell it, maybe one of you guys will be able to feel what i felt today.

FRIDAY ,22 JANUARY 2010

i finally have my own blog. the purpose i made this blog is to record my daily activities. so, what ever thing that i had done, i will write it down here. i hope that i can make good use of this blog.